Womanly Tales

For some people in my generation and certainly most of those in my Dad and GrandDad’s generations of Indians the question has always been – Mera number kab aayega? Roughly translated, this means – ‘When will my number come?’. This question, akin to a tattoo in our collective consciousness over the better part of the first fifty years of independence, reflected a sense that one was in a perpetual queue waiting to be given an opportunity that truly spoke to one’s potential. And this was perhaps when the going was good. When the going was not so good, it came with a certain desperation about this period of scarcity of opportunity that it would certainly outlive us and our next generation. Day in and out, those of us who could went about doing all the “right” things – Getting an education, Getting a job (any job) at the cost of a Masters or a PhD, Getting married by age 25, Starting a family by age 25, Taking care of our aging parents & grand-parents etc… We endured our karma quietly. We even improved our environments amidst all its limitations. We served up courage and stoicism to our family daily and if that didn’t work there was always guilt and shame. “Do you know what my pocket money was when I was your age?” or “What will people think (if they saw you behaving the way you are now…)?”.

January, 2011
We are travelling down a highway to Agra with family. On large billboards owned almost exclusively by large telecom companies, one phrase struck me as interesting because it was commonplace. “Mera Number Ab Hai”. This roughly translates to a ‘My time is now’.

This declaration is bold, raw and even a bit audacious. Regardless of who you are, it said, and regardless of where you come from, it is your time if you are an Indian. There is plentitude of space to apply yourself and see it take root and grow. With an economy that is growing at about 8 – 9% annually, for you and me that means an explosion of opportunities like one has never imagined.

We are certainly not prepared for this explosion. Some of this is reflected in the hourly shouting matches on News channels between journalist-turned-middle class activists and our politicians. The battle is sadly confined to discussions between the haves and the have-nots of middle class India – a growing to the point of bursting at the seams group of materialistic, morality spewing people who crave to be going places. Some of these individuals in my generation are equally desperate as before – but this time around it’s about availing each and every opportunity as means to compensate for many years of starvation. Seeing them engorge their lives is akin to watching a hungry man eat. These are the same individuals who complain the most about rising costs, while it would seem also enjoying the fact that they can afford a ‘good life’. These are the individuals who circumvent the globe as many times a year as possible simply because that’s what people going places do. These are the very same individuals pushing the boundaries of local industries by trying to recreate their new found status in plush bathrooms and italian kitches every other year.

Collectively Indian society is shifting places. The aspirations of young children are equally bold and fresh. There are certain pockets of industry that are booming and as a result bringing in large amounts of profits, the likes of which have not been seen before. As a result the world is in India trying to build a market share. Much of this consumer frenzy is governed by middle class sentiments. For example, the malls that sell ‘phoren maal’ are plentiful and full of people while a Dilli Haat that proudly but quietly showcases the best of local craft work across India is still about as busy as five or more years ago. Another example is this surge in Hindu art. Deepan and I spent half a morning exploring the art galleries in Hauz Khas village and it was incredible how fashionable Hinduism is now. It isn’t a reflection of our inherent spiritual roots but moreso an opulent sketch of Hindu Gods – reinforcing the pursuit of material things as one of life’s four goals. A few days later we were at the Delhi Art Summit – an event that was the ‘place to be’ and to ‘be seen’ bringing together more than 500 art galleries from all over the world to showcase the best of art for an audience waiting to be coaxed and cajoled to sharing their purse. And share they did, if the fast disappearing stocks in the Art Shop were an indication. Yours truly also managed to pick up a few gifts for my London home. The larger works of art however eluded us this trip – either because the market appeared much inflated with young artists of a few years’ ago now appearing as ‘very established’ artists – or because the market was still trying to find its feet as art work from all over the world competed for our attention.

One can’t but get swept in all of this new energy. Sitting in a car, amidst traffic jams, I sat with Deepan brainstorming about a couple of ideas that we could get involved in — such is the compelling pull of this economic whirlpool that feeds off anything and everything. Across industry, there is a large battle for talent. What can you offer me that ten other companies are not currently doing already? That’s the question proposed by freshers out of university with barely 1-2 months of expertise. Experienced folks are few and far inbetween. The ability to train in-house is still a low priority strategically and hence for those who can afford to (which is just about any company today) there is a lot of quick money to be made through ‘Rapid’and ‘Quick fix’programs.

Of course there are negatives to this new economy most of which arise out the fact that we are not prepared for it. But this post is not going to dwell on that. Instead I want to sit back against my sofa and simply re-charge. Like a good Ayurvedic massage, I’d like to think that as many of us as possible is benefitting from this sudden access to energy. Like standing in the warmth of a winter Sun in Delhi, we all have the opportunity to replenish our cells with energy in its purest form. And for now this is enough. Ab Mera Number Hai.

Gosh – It seems like an eternity since I last blogged. It’s been a rocky year thus far and by the nature and volume of jyotish readings I’ve been doing – it seems like there are far more out there going through the same in different areas of their life.
A few weeks back Deepan (It’s unnerving how early on he can pick on the pulse of what’s going to be hot..) told me that David Cameron and what seemed like ‘everybody who’s somebody’ in the British government are due to go to India. This time has come and the BBC has been chronicling the foreign trip. Despite the fact that he visited the US and then Turkey, the media reports have all but ignored these visits and instead focused largely on the third visit – that to India.
It certainly is an interesting time for this visit and the different media reports are a fabulous fiest for a budding (albeit ingenue) sociopath like myself [I've been watching the new series - Sherlock and it is bloody fantastic! Catch it on BBC iPlayer if possible]
The main question (as reported in the media) of course is this: What has the United Kingdom got to offer India?
If you are not somebody who has any interest in things English, you might approach this question objectively. You might say: UK has an economic growth rate of just about 1% while India is looking to steadily grow at 8% through 2020. From a labor point of view, the current UK government won it’s mandate by being openly critical of the immigration of ‘Highly skilled’ migrants – a bulk of them coming in from the sub-continent. Tax payers in the UK can pay up to 40% income tax while their Indian conterparts are discussing ways to reduce the income tax (to about 25%) for their citizens.
This question however is not merely an objective one. There are many shades of meaning that become more clear if you are a bit more tuned to both cultures. This is the space that interests me. Instead of looking at the mere objective facts, we need to understand the cultural tones to assess the quality of this relationship. Facts and numbers in itself are not as compelling as beliefs.
The British believe they are no good – this is a country that love to underestimate themselves. Be it sport (Andy Murray in Wimbledon) or films (in the shadow of Hollywood) or even politics (hijacked in an All-American train – was akin to what a former UN official testified to yesterday in the Iraq Enquiries) it’s the same story of poor self-esteem on one hand and crass underestimation on the other.
Indians on the other hand find it very easy to over-estimate themselves. Both the current government and the opposition have run political campaigns based on declaring India a super power (under the India rising campaign) – The difference however is that the current government won the mandate of the people on their campaign while the opposition lost.
This trip thus is fascinating to watch unravel because both parties are clearly on opposite ends of the spectrum — though I don’t believe in linearity — so if we take the two opposite ends and form a circle — these are are bound together albeit with their backs in contact. So for all the hand shaking that will be going on — another interesting topic to discuss…in a bit… to me this is a case of two cultures forced to interact because they’ve no more to back up against.. If I were a cartoonist I would draw both Cameron and Singh back to back against one another…with an old ship’s anchor binding Cameron’s left and Singh’s right leg on one side and a more shiny fiberoptic cable loosely binding the rest of their bodies while they twist their heads to say hello. Here too, I would imagine Singh’s face twisted to the left with a smile that reflects our ‘Athithi devo bhava’ (Guests are like god) philosophy whilst Cameron is turning to his right in the opposite direction to Singh’s with a smile and tikka on his forehead which absolutely says nothing about his real intentions. As I am an Indian, I am tempted to add that Cameron’s nose would be just slightly turned up…but then that would just be my cultural bias.
The biggest problem for the British that stems from this deep rooted ‘We’re not good enough’ belief is that this means they are going to be thinking about what this relationship means to them to death. All the media reports here reflect this obsession — What have we got to offer? [followed by a snigger or an odd shake of the head]. The problem is not the belief itself – Instead it’s the behavior that it encourages that is very self-indulgent and ruminative. The British are only thinking of themselves — what does this mean to us? The result of this is that they tend to perceived as being ‘preachy’ or even ‘sly’. From a negotiation perspective, all the British can think up is their ‘Win’ — they completely blind themselves to what their counterparts define as their ‘Win’. In order to reach any agreement, the Indians will need to thus be indulgent — is that possible?
The Indians tend to easily over-estimate themselves. Our history is glorious and we take this to heart. So regardless of the poverty figures or the health issues we face, every Indian is genuinely secure in ourselves. Things aren’t of course all that rosey — Our belief tends to make us lynch onto what others are saying about us — and so emotionally we’re hostage to our opponents. For example, look at the media reports about this visit. By and large the English media are reporting verbatum what the foreign press is saying this trip. There’re taking the British under-stated quality and translating that to feed their need to over-state their role.
Of course I don’t imply in any way here that Mr. Cameron and Dr. Singh (who I think is a fabulous leader) are not serious about business — I just question the beliefs behind these two men and their people and wonder if it isn’t a case of history repeating itself. There was a previous time when the British came in to do business and it ended in them violating our dignity and peace. The esteemed first leader of Tanzania said of the whites – They came to our country, gave us bibles and taught us how to pray with our eyes closed. When we opened our eyes, we had their bibles, and they had our land.
The differing economic growth rates have not changed our beliefs – - Indians will do well to treat our guests well but not indulge them without clearly defining our own priorities.
This brings me to the hand shake comment. Indians do not shake hands – we bring our palms together to greet other people. By this we mean we are greeting the soul in you and establishing that we are both equal despite our inequalities (wealth,education etc).
We’ve learnt this hand-shaking business from our ‘guests’ and we do it because we want to be seen as welcoming. However history has taught us to distrust the hand shake — so we do it with utmost disrespect for the gesture itself. To us shaking hands is an endorcement that the whites will break that trust that they like to prematurely impose on every relationship before it is ready to trust.
For the British contingent, this will be a trip where they will be well cared for – if they are only thinking of themselves however, this is perhaps all that this trip will mean. For the Indian contingent, they will need to be more consultative of their private and public enterprises to define what their ‘win’ is and do that at the cost of going overboard welcoming and indulging our guests.
This meeting is not going to be about politics or global ‘security’ – instead it is going to be about business. The British are exemplary middle men and this is the core strength that they are playing to. The Indians on the other hand have a full plate and if history is anything to go by, will be most generous (even at their own peril) to share what they have. This meeting has the potential of something very special and that is exactly why it is equally vulnerable and fragile.
The world needs India and India can either leverage the best middle men out there to bridge the gap or simply ignore the lot.

After a quick tea break we were up for speaker number two, who’s topic was titled ‘The idea of India’, rather deceptively, let me warn you. If I thought this was going to be a crescendo the like we’d hear after a good rom-com, it wasn’t. The professor from John Hopkins was a Sindhi who read his speech from a print-out. He had little to no public speaking skills but what he read out was quite an insightful political analysis of the Indian economic journey. He was also the author of the book ‘The idea of India‘ written in the late 1990s. Mr. Khilani’s speech was about the cost we will pay if we do not heed to the many different problems that currently get swept under the magic carpet that is our flying economy! Problems, what problems, you might think. Isn’t the American adage – ‘It’s the economy, stupid’ really the only problem in this world? [Clearly Obama doesn't think so otherwise the world wdn't witness this crazy wrestling match he is part of against gun-tottling Republican madmen!]
So what are the problems we are building up to? [Haven't we heard enough already about poverty and the environment and its like? Will someone call Mr. Kumar back into the room please?] Here’s a list I gathered:
- Mr. Khilnani started with a beautiful phrase – ‘Intriguing inversion of Indianness’: What he means is that in the 70s or 80s most products being sold in India were marketed with pictures of Switzerland. So you’d buy a bar of soap that had a graphic of the Swiss Alps in the background. Today this has changed. Indianness he said is becoming a big selling point and yet he argued, this ‘Indianness’ is as fictional as were the ‘Swiss alps’.
- If anybody has read Mr. Nilekani’s book or listened to his interviews you would be familiar with India’s favorable demographic divident. Mr. Khilnani picks up on this thread early on in his speech. In ten years the average age in India will be 30. Recent survey show that Indians are amongst the most aspirational citizens in the world today. Now, he pauses, let’s bring these two seemingly positive occurences, one a reflection of today and another a calculation for ten years from now – - and let’s ask ourselves what this means. Today in a village, young men can see a shop full of the latest cell phones and gadgets and aspire to ‘one day’ own the one he likes most. In ten years time, will his aspiration be realized? This is the question Mr. Khilnani wants us to ponder. Given our current status quo his argument is a resounding no. Furthermore he adds that the single most common reason for citizens taking up arms is not poverty but a case of dashed hopes. This is what he refers to as the “paradox of a new prosperity that is material for future concern.” You got to love this man’s expressions. So what if he’s just reading it off an article that perhaps was previously published – so what if he doesn’t once look up at his audience? The best part is that he’s not done yet with this argument.
- 1/3 of India is afflicted with naxal-related activities, reflecting this impatience that translates into acts of vioence. Who, he asked, will protect the optimism of the young?
- Finding the answers to a more “equitable growth” will be critical to us not ten years from now but today. The idea of redistributing wealth is not a new one to Indian history. He is referring here to past failed attempts by Nehru’s as well as current failures with positive discrimination [reservation] in private companies.
Interspersed in his arguments are the following stats:
- 70% of Indians are employed in the informal sectors. Who will protect their rights?
- Child mortality rates in India are higher than those of Ethiopia!!!
- 43% of children under the age of five are mal-nourished.
Moving on to his next argument, Mr. Khilnani offers us my favorite expression from his whole speech yet. He refers to the “geographical assymetry of India’s growth” – something that can be easily explained with numbers. Gujurat is growing at three times the rate of Bihar. Punjab earns about five times as much as Bihar. Kerala’s literacy rate is a miracle number for the likes of UP. Mr. Kumar referred to this simplistically as the Northern-Southern divide. Mr. Khilnani instead refers to it as the unweildy scale of some states. At least four states have a population over a 100 million and UP alone will be as large as 250 million. 28% of Indian population are in cities while this number is due to rise to 36% by 2020. Apart from the four big cities today, there will be 70 more of these in the near future. How will we meet the challenges of scarcer resources and a parliament that has more representatives from states that are most populous but not necessarily the same states that are the most educated or the most affluent. The reality of Mayawati as Prime Minister is purely about numbers and this drama is unfolding as we speak where in UP new constituencies are being drawn up as I type!
As I draw to the end of this post [one that inevitably will be published in two posts - Deepan just commented that nobody will have the patience to read such a long post!], I am reminded of the spinning wheel of Time that preceded every episode of the Mahabharata series on television. Time doesn’t wait for anyone nor is it possible for human beings to hold the wheel of time. The call to action for us is in recognizing the humility of our position. We need to reject the chest thumping draw of love and war and instead focus on a more tempered, holistic approach. Having Dr Manmohan Singh is reassuring for he isn’t your alpha male. Having a Sonia Gandhi as head of the Congress is also a blessing, one we are often most arrogant to ignore. Together this team can do more, and have started to in this very ‘Out of the box’ union of leadership.
The wheel is ever-moving and like Willie Darylymple said in his book launch [details in another post] – “…In our life time we will see the world order reversed…” – there is a core fatalistic thread to all this, one that needs to anchor us with resolve and not indifference.